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Is it all my fault?

“Did I do something wrong?” parents ask me. “Did I create these issues? Is it all my fault?” My answer to this is probably going to feel frustrating: I don’t know and what’s more, I don’t think it matters.

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Make the Friday the 13th lucky

I love this song and the video makes it even better. It’ll make any bad day instantly brighter. “Chaiyya Chaiyya” is the song that they’re playing over the opening scene in Inside Man (although that’s a different mix). Crank up your... read more

The lies of suffering

If you are unhappy then it’s time for something to change. Physical pain exists to keep us safe. It says, “Stop running on your broken leg! Take care of that scrape right this minute!” It’s how emotional pain works, too. Emotional pain reminds... read more

When therapists are wrong

When you look at the ethical guidelines for therapists a whole lot of them are in place to address the power imbalance between therapist and client. In the minds of our clients, the things we therapists do or say hold greater weight than the same thoughts that, say,... read more

I had to share this video of Chris Pratt

We’ve always liked Andy Dwyer at our house and we hear the guy who plays him does some pretty nice things but I’m sharing this clip of Chris Pratt on The Ellen Show (heads up courtesy of Jezebel) because it illustrates some great parenting. First, this guy... read more

Support for Adoptive Parents

For adoptive parents, discussing adoption with their children is a lifelong conversation starting (hopefully) as soon as they arrive to the family and continuing on for the rest of their lives.

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Why? Because

Sometimes we won’t know why. Sometimes we won’t know why until later. And that’s ok because sometimes we don’t need to know why.

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Thankful

This beautiful video was making the rounds a few years ago. This is something I am unlikely to ever see in person and I feel lucky that I get to see it here and I am thankful for all the beauty in the world, the seen and the unseen. For those of you celebrating, I... read more

It Bears Repeating

There’s a reason we have to turn into broken records; our kids are always growing and so they need to learn some things over and over and over again.

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Parenting for Now

It can be a tricky balance to both grow kids for the future and be here with the present child in front of us at the exact same time.

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My thoughts on Lena Dunham

I’ve been asked about my thoughts on Lena Dunham and the passages in her book that detail her sexual behavior with her sister. At first I declined to post them here because I felt like there have already been so many people talking about it that I really had... read more

Adoption Academy this Monday

We adoptive parents tend to seek each other out for information and support and sometimes that’s appropriate but if we don’t widen our cultural view we run into the danger of assuming that our vantage point is the only one or the most right one.

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Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month and October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. On the 15th many families who are living with loss will light a candle at 7pm their time to create a “wave of light” in remembrance of their... read more

Why is therapy so expensive?

There’s no getting around the fact that therapy can be expensive. Sure, you may pay less than you would for a hair cut and color or just a little more than you would for a massage, but most people don’t get their hair cut as often as they’re likely... read more